I had a dream last night I was going to commit suicide by jumping into this muddy deep pond. I was wearing some black heavy sweats…tops & bottoms that would soak up the water helping me sink quicker. I jumped in but I came up swimming to the banks. The banks that everyone said were impossible to climb. I decided to try and with each step up, I wondered if I wanted to continue. The clothes were weighing me down, the grass I grabbed, slipped through my hands and the rocks for my feet were scarce. When I actually made it close to the top, I heard trucks and cars driving by on the busy highway above. I hung on wondering if I wanted to take that last leap up onto the highway or not.
I heard that these hearings (Kavanaugh/Ford-Blassey) have brought to the surface memories, anxiety or other issues for many victims of sexual abuse or harassment. I’m not sure if this dream is because of the hearings, because I did watch a good deal of them, but it definitely has made me think. In fact it has consumed my mind. However I am the strongest person I know. Yes I said that and will say it again; I am the strongest person I know.
If you know me and/or have read my book you know I know firsthand abuse, harassment and the physical and mental toll it takes on a person.
I’m not sniveling, bragging or taking sides but do want to express my feelings and opinions because my written word makes me well.
First I must say if that’s all that happened to her, she is very fortunate and as a psychologist she should have been able to deal with it/worked it out a long time ago. I don’t know why she spoke as a little valley girl with all the credentials and awards she has earned and if she suffers from any anxiety I don’t understand why you would fill yourself with caffeine. I can’t tell if she is telling the truth or not. I don’t know if anything happened to her or if it did, I don’t know if it was Kavanaugh or another. I even feel like it could be a political stunt.
Secondly, I understand Kavanaugh being so angry that his emotions were all over the place. But I would have hoped he could have gotten his composer a lot sooner being a judge and the position holder, teacher etc. that he is and has been but then too we cannot understand the stress and torment he has gone through since these allegations have surfaced. Here too I can’t tell if he is telling the truth or not.
I told my husband when the “me too” movement started that every man in any kind of “position” should be shaking in their boots. I want to say, because I believe all men are this way, but that can’t be correct, can it? I wish boys were better but I continue to hear boys doing terrible things. I know, girls are bad too, but that “boys will be boys” expectancy has gone on far too long.
I wish I didn’t have to say that I believe everything is corrupt but I just did. I don’t trust what I hear on the news anymore. You’d think I wouldn’t even look at the news but I do. I watch it like it’s an outline an idea of what’s going on. I do like to know what’s coming at me, just in case something’s real.
Well these are my thoughts and I feel better for writing them as I said, my written words make me well. And with that I leave you with, goodnight, sweet dreams and say some prayers.
I heard that these hearings (Kavanaugh/Ford-Blassey) have brought to the surface memories, anxiety or other issues for many victims of sexual abuse or harassment. I’m not sure if this dream is because of the hearings, because I did watch a good deal of them, but it definitely has made me think. In fact it has consumed my mind. However I am the strongest person I know. Yes I said that and will say it again; I am the strongest person I know.
If you know me and/or have read my book you know I know firsthand abuse, harassment and the physical and mental toll it takes on a person.
I’m not sniveling, bragging or taking sides but do want to express my feelings and opinions because my written word makes me well.
First I must say if that’s all that happened to her, she is very fortunate and as a psychologist she should have been able to deal with it/worked it out a long time ago. I don’t know why she spoke as a little valley girl with all the credentials and awards she has earned and if she suffers from any anxiety I don’t understand why you would fill yourself with caffeine. I can’t tell if she is telling the truth or not. I don’t know if anything happened to her or if it did, I don’t know if it was Kavanaugh or another. I even feel like it could be a political stunt.
Secondly, I understand Kavanaugh being so angry that his emotions were all over the place. But I would have hoped he could have gotten his composer a lot sooner being a judge and the position holder, teacher etc. that he is and has been but then too we cannot understand the stress and torment he has gone through since these allegations have surfaced. Here too I can’t tell if he is telling the truth or not.
I told my husband when the “me too” movement started that every man in any kind of “position” should be shaking in their boots. I want to say, because I believe all men are this way, but that can’t be correct, can it? I wish boys were better but I continue to hear boys doing terrible things. I know, girls are bad too, but that “boys will be boys” expectancy has gone on far too long.
I wish I didn’t have to say that I believe everything is corrupt but I just did. I don’t trust what I hear on the news anymore. You’d think I wouldn’t even look at the news but I do. I watch it like it’s an outline an idea of what’s going on. I do like to know what’s coming at me, just in case something’s real.
Well these are my thoughts and I feel better for writing them as I said, my written words make me well. And with that I leave you with, goodnight, sweet dreams and say some prayers.